Loneliness is no joke because it can come with a side of negative thoughts and uncomfortable emotions. In the Negative Thoughts Club are typically things like “I can’t talk to anybody” or “nobody cares about me.” These often come up because of low self-esteem, says therapist Daria Stepanian, LMFT. Feelings like sadness, anger, resentment, emptiness, anxiety, and depression can come up too, Stepanian explains. As you can imagine, this can make loneliness a hell of a lot worse.
Maybe you miss a long-distance S.O. Maybe you’ve just packed up and moved to a new city and haven’t found an inner circle of friends yet. Maybe you’re surrounded by a ton of people but still feel loneliness like it’s your first, middle, and last name.
Don’t worry though! There are plenty of things (even small things) you can do when you’re lonely to help it suck a little less. Enter, journaling. This exercise enables you to take a step back and assess how loneliness is making you feel, how you treat yourself when you’re feeling this way, and where to go from where you’re currently at. Journaling can also help you release the negativity you may be experiencing and find a sense of calm, says Stepanian.
Writing about your loneliness can separate it from who you are as a person too, which gives you more power back and may make it easier to deal with, says therapist Lawrence Jackson, PhD, LMFT. So use these journal prompts to get cozy with your loneliness and lean into some positivity (if you’re up for that). Go ahead!
Feeling lonely? Turn to one (or more) of these journal prompts:
1. Fill in the blank: I am most lonely when ______________.
2. How long have you been feeling lonely? How and why do you think it started?
3. Do you feel lonely all the time or in certain situations?
4. How have you dealt with similar feelings of loneliness in the past? Are you happy with how you handled being lonely then? Why or why not?
5. Describe the difference between loneliness and being alone. If you don’t see a difference, write about why that is.
6. Take a second to pause and look inward. What other emotions piggyback off of loneliness? Are you feeling frustrated, sad, or anxious? Write about what comes up.
7. Would reaching out to other people make you feel less lonely? Why or why not?
8. Write a note to your loneliness without filtering yourself. What do you really want to say?
9. What would you tell someone close to you who’s feeling lonely? Do you feel like you can take your own advice? Why or why not?
10. How do you talk to yourself when you’re lonely? Are you kind to yourself or not so kind? List some examples. How does this make you feel?
11. Write about a time when you felt super supported in your life. Are there ways you can get to that support now? If so, write about how you can achieve that.
12. Who is in your close circle right now? Do these people make you feel more lonely or less lonely?
13. Write the pep talk you want to hear right now from yourself or someone else. Don’t hold back!
14. Describe how loneliness feels in your body.
15. Is any type of loss or change associated with your experience of loneliness? If so, are there any positives that have come from that loss or change?
16. Write down at least five compliments you’ve received in the past. How do they make you feel now?
17. Write a letter of any length to someone you haven’t talked to in a while but want to check in with. You can tell them how you’re feeling or not—it’s up to you.
18. Does social media fuel or thaw your sense of loneliness? You can focus on your fave app or generalize all of the profiles you have.
19. Reflect on a time you felt most happy. List a few ways you can get to that happiness.
20. Was there ever a time you were OK with feeling lonely? How is this time different or the same?
21. List out five nice things you can do for someone else soon (it can be one thing for five different people or five things for one person). Then, list five you can do for yourself.
22. What are some short-term and long-term goals you have for yourself? What are some small steps you can take today to move towards one of those goals?
23. If your loneliness was a movie or TV character from anything you’ve ever watched, who would it be, and why?
24. What responsibilities do you have right now, and how do you feel about each? Do any of them excite you? Challenge you? Worry you? Bring you down?
25. How can you best connect with the people and things you love? If you’re already connected with them and still feel lonely, is there anything you feel is missing from your life?
Wondermind does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a replacement for medical advice. Always consult a qualified health or mental health professional with any questions or concerns about your mental health.
